Why is it gorgeous outside, and totally stifling in the house? …oh, right, because 90% of our windows are in two adjacent rooms at one side of the house. >.< Anyway. I'm trying out a gift card for cash exchange, and I’m a little nervous about it, so let’s distract ourselves — with DOLLS! Totally shocking, I know.

One of these things is not like the others; one of these things does not belong.

Hmm. Hmm…who should we focus on first…eh, let’s start with Tristen, she’s got the least photos. And by ‘least,’ I mean ‘one.’ I was a little preoccupied with the bigger girls when I was taking pics the other day, and she got a little ignored. I know, she doesn’t really fit in, but this started out as a continuation of Pressies!, and she was bought with part of the b-day money my brother sent me. So…there she is. She’s the original Tristen from the Moxie Teenz line, and I had been kind of hovering around her for a while, but I was hesitant, primarily because of the inset eyes. When painted doll eyes go wrong, its unfortunate. When inset eyes go wrong, you get creepy zombie dolls. Case in point – LiV dolls. They photograph beautifully, and tend to be soulless, wonk-eyed brainslurpers in person. But then someone listed a NIB Tristen cheap on eBay, and I snapped that bitch up.

Have I ever mentioned I have an eye obsession?

And I am so glad I did! I want more, y’all. She does have a few problems (her knee joints are a bit weak, her one wrist joint is a little FUBAR and can’t bend one way, her wig is of a lower-quality hair that gets rather fly-away) but all in all, I think she’s pretty great. She’s got joints coming out the wazoo, and a pretty face, and her clothes are a little Hot Topic/Forver 21 for my taste, but I do like the color scheme, and aside from the poofy skirt, it all seems pretty comfy (that zipper-tooth hem looks rad, but I would not want to wear it). And the eyelashes that annoyed me so much when I was looking at pictures online? I actually kind of like them in person. They blend more with her facepaint than you’d think, and frankly, anything that brings attention to those eyes is a good thing. I’m seriously looking forward to seeing what the other Teenz eyes look like, because Tristen’s are phenomenal. They’re multicolor. Up-close, from the right angle, they seem to be a slightly greyish blue, with a gold ring aroung the pupil, but most of the time, from most angles, they’re purple. Big, lavendar eyes, surrounded by black lashes. Guh. Crushing so hard, here. *sigh*

Hey, pretty lady, watcha looking at?

Moving clockwise, we have Evan, my 2008 Ultra Basic Tyler Wentworth Blonde. I love that face sculpt. I originally fell in love with the Redhead (that’s her standing behind Evan, we’ll get to her), and I liked her so much that I wound up falling for all the 2008 UB Tylers. Unfortunately, I now have the two easiest to find ones. I’ve only seen the Raven for sale three times, and the con-exclusive Brunette that I’m not even entirely sure exists I have seen precisely never. Evan herself eluded me for several months before I snagged her as a decently-priced BIN. Had I waited even a day, I’m sure someone else would’ve found her and grabbed her. Her clothes are a little boring at the moment, as the poor dear is still in her default bodysuit, but what can you do, Tonner-sized clothes are expensive.

She lacks Carter's visual drama, but she's a beauty in her own right.

I’m thinking bright blue would be fantastic on her. She lovely regardless — hell, she manages to pull off orange lipstick, how the hell do you do that? — but the right color really gives the UBs oomph. As evidenced by her cousin….

That HAIR. That FACE. ....oh, hey, Esme's there, too.

Carter, my darling beloved 2008 UB TW Redhead. Yes, that’s the Esme I got for my birthday beside her, wearing Carter’s old suit, in fact, but focus, people. Look at Caaarteeeeeeeeer. She’s always beautiful, you do Tonner-related searches on eBay, and the UB Redhead shows up over and over as a model for dresses and jewelry; she’s just a great canvas. But that simple espresso brown wrap-top just makes her hair and her eyes and her skintone look amazing. It and the jeans are both from Liquid Sunshine Online. I’ve had the top for a while, but I only just got the jeans with the other half of my b-day money, so that is why Carter is in this post*. That and I luff her omg.

Tall, red, and gorgeous.

Uh-oh. Something got their attention.

Oh, yeah. They're up to something.

LOOK AT THAT HAIR, HOLYSHIT.

….sorry about that. Where were we? Oh, right, Esme!

And she's out of focus.

Bitch has some kind of anti-photo superpowers, I don’t even know. I admit that I am not that great at taking pictures (for all I like doing it), but this is ridiculous. As long as she’s with Carter (BFFs!), things turn out fine. But the minute I try and take a just-Esme picture, its out of focus, or there’s shadow that is somehow ONLY ON HER. No, really:

And now its too dark.

See? Its a bright, lovely day, AND ESME STILL MANAGES TO BE IN SHADOW WTF.

AND THOSE ARE THE ONES THAT TURNED OUT. For given value of “turned out.” I dunno, maybe she’s shyer than I initially thought, and Carter helps her chillax. I mean, they were pretty obviously plotting something. It just better not involve Esme getting clothes, because my wallet has cartoon moths fluttering out of it, and my Paypal account has a grand total of $.38. This well is all tapped-out. …..maybe for Christmas, though.

*You are now wondering why Evan is there, then, yes? Its very simple: because, yes. ;p