Is it weird that I think I would’ve preferred Kick-Ass had it just been about Hit Girl and Big Daddy? Kick-Ass the character pretty much lost my sympathy and interest when he first, despite being a comic junkie, could not think of why no one ever tried to be a super-hero in real life (its called “even the goddamn Batman got his back broke by someone bigger and stronger, and no one in real life is the goddamn Batman,” dumbass). And then again (more-so) when he got stabbed and hit by a car, and at no point during injury, recovery or after thought to himself, “Oh, right. That’s why no one does it.”

And then later calls other people and situations insane. While wearing the sphincter suit. Pot, kettle.

And the suit. A diving suit was actually not a bad choice for a average-joe super-hero suit, but the colors and design and fit on that just made me go, “Hi, Sphincter” every time he came on camera wearing it. I can’t believe not one person ever said, “Hey, thanks, nice work, you know you look like an asshole, though, right?”

That said…I did enjoy the movie, for the most part. And I wouldn’t mind a sequel. And a Hit Girl action figure. To eBay!